how things went wrong

it all started when we formed a group.
during that time,i thought that it's not the right time to do this thing.
i mean,we were not that close.
and maybe one day, we'll start to regret it.
as days go by, i felt happy with them. i forgot the thoughts that i had before.
but months passed, and i felt that some things changed.
i started to feel that i don't belong.they became different for me.
actually, it's not only that, they seemed ignorant on someone.
i know that she's our friend but it's too much. they were treating her like she's a goddess.
it's okay for me but the fact that i find it hard to talk to them is really different.
and i found it so irritating that they speak about one person for almost every time.
at first, i kept everything that i feel because i thought that it would be the best thing to do in this kind of situation.
but they never changed.instead, it got worse.
i decided to tell my thoughts to a trusted friend
and we realized that we were thinking about the same thing.
i just let that pass and continued to go with them even though there are times that what they are doing led me to shedding tears.
i was still feeling that I'm not important to them and i don't belong but i just kept those emotions.
then on valentines day, i gave them a card.
it contained greetings and messages that thanked them and apologies if i hurt them.
with those messages, i wrote my feelings in Hangul/Korean characters.
i was too shy to say those things to them.
there are few of them that can understand that anyway.
then i gave it to them with my hopes up and with the belief that they would understand me.
i was happy seeing some of them reading it and at least appreciating my effort of giving something to them.
they passed the card to everyone.
but later, my friend found it on the floor without anyone bothering to pick it up.
she told me that she found it just there.
tears flowed from my eyes and my emotions came out.
i was deeply hurt that they were not even giving importance to my efforts.
i know i did my best to become a good friend to them.
but i guess it wasn't enough.
i heard them talking about it and it seemed that it was all my fault.
i never heard a single sorry from them.
they never admitted to me that they had some faults too.
all i want is for them to realize that i may have my mistakes
but they have their own faults too.
and it's how things went wrong.
i guess we just lack admitting that we have our own mistakes and we have to do something before more things become ruined.
now, i just gave more attention to friends who value me and spend time with them.
i learned that i have these friends who are worth my time
and i must give importance to them.
with my realizations and my wonderful friends, i continue to live life.
and what will happen next?
only God knows that.